The Purpose That Drives Your Lifeby Randy Gage
“That’s the difference with you,” Mastermind Council member Peter Pearson remarked at dinner one night. “You really don’t care what people think about you.” “That’s true,” I responded... “No, I mean you really don’t care!” Guilty as charged. Now I would be lying if I told you it was always that way. In fact, quite the opposite. Now I could regale you with stories from my childhood and analyze where my insecurities came from—but what’s the point. Existence exists. Things are what they are. Or as I have been known to tell guys in my seminars, “If I find your inner child, I’m going to kick his little ass!” At some point, you have to let it go. Move on with your life. You have to be willing to give up your victim mentality and go past that, for that is where the real breakthroughs are. Once you have strong self-esteem, you really don’t care what others think of you. You really get that the responsibility is theirs, and has nothing to do with you. So we’ve really got two issues here, both springing off of the same base. First is the issue of self-confidence, and the second is having a thought process different than most people. Not participating in “tribal thought.” How do you develop the natural tendency to think different for success and not participate in “tribal thought?” It all begins with your fundamental core values. The things that are the most important to you, as this drives the actions you take every day. And these spring forth from your central purpose in life. Which immediately tells you why most people go through their entire lives sick, broke and stupid. Now I don’t say that to be mean or arrogant, but we need to speak truth here. And the truth is that most people struggle through life simply reacting to events around them, oblivious to the fact that they help to create those events. Like a ship tossed at sea, they see themselves buffeted by external circumstances, a tiny object subject to the wrath of the universe. Most people are nowhere near ideal health. In fact, you could conservatively estimate that 90% of them suffer from obesity, low energy, disease, or a combination of these. Most people are nowhere near wealthy. Now that may sound crass, in light of how much prosperity there appears to be in developed countries like the States, Europe, Asia and many other places. And there is no doubt that a great deal of progress has been made. Even most people considered poor in those areas have good shelter, electricity, telephone, heating/air conditioning, and of course — TV. So while they are wildly rich by the standards of the third world—truth is, many of these people are one hospital bill, or two weeks layoff from bankruptcy. Personal debt has never been higher, and personal savings have never been lower. These people give the appearance of being prosperous, but the reality is that they are broke. Which brings us to door number three. Stupid. Just the fact that most people live their lives sick and broke tells us that they are not rocket scientists. And before you accuse me of arrogance and insensitivity, stop. I’m not happy that those people live that way. And while I agree many were born as victims of circumstances, I don’t believe they have to stay that way. I myself was born sick, broke and stupid, and lived almost 30 years in that reality. But I ultimately prevailed in rising above that, and I believe everyone can. And that is why I write this now, and do the work that I do. I want you, and millions more like you to taste the life of health, abundance, and intellectual stimulation. To look forward to each and every day with eager anticipation, passion and joy. Now to do that, however, may take having a dramatic shift in your mindset, beliefs and opinion on life . . . It may mean developing a life purpose for the first time, or replacing the one you have right now. And that may mean you have to dramatically alter the view you have of yourself, and your role in the world. If you’re like most sick, broke and stupid people, you define yourself by your roles (husband, engineer, symphony board member, etc.), and you view your purpose through the eyes of servicing others, contributing to the greater good, or looking after the people around you. If this is the case—you are insane. And you’re no doubt sick, broke, and stupid! Now if you haven’t thrown this lesson away after that last statement, let me explain my comments. If you define yourself by your roles (Ray’s wife, Becky’s husband), then you have no personal identity. Which means a low self-esteem and opinion of yourself. And if you see your main purpose in life as serving others, you’re probably personally responsible for the founding of at least three co-dependents anonymous chapters. Let me go on the record and say, if your main purpose in life is to “serve others” or “serve God”—you have an extremely low opinion of yourself, don’t believe you are worthy, and will experience a tremendous amount of lack and limitation in your life. Now you might come back with something like, “Really, I don’t need all those outside things to be happy. I don’t care about money and material things. A car just gets you from point A to point B. I am happy to live in a hut in the rain forest and teach the savages about Christianity. If I get enough grubs to eat, and a thatched roof over my head I am happy. I am serving others, which is the noble thing. I am doing God’s work, and I will be rewarded in the afterlife.” Now you could come back with this type of recourse. And if you did, put this down right now, back away from your binder and call in to cancel your membership immediately. You are so stupid and emotionally dysfunctional, there is nothing I can do for you. Sell all of your possessions immediately and join an Ashram, monastery, or cult. Or you might want to consider running away with the carnival. You have a condition. A condition clinically termed insanity. So why do I say that? Well let’s look at what exactly insanity is. I would define it as: “Unsoundness of mind to render a person unfit to maintain a relationship, or look after his or her own needs for emotional well being and survival.” People who spend their existence worrying solely about the needs of others and not themselves are not nobles, benevolent, and spiritual. They are crazy. And because they don’t look after their own needs first, they really can’t help others in a healthy way. They can console them, participate in their drama, or enable their co-dependence, but they can’t offer them real, meaningful help. Or to repeat an oft-quoted line from a character in “The Fountainhead...” “To say ‘I love you,’ one must first know how to say the word ‘I.’” You know that to love anyone else, you must first love yourself. But are you really aware of what that means on a practical application level? Ayn Rand taught, and I absolutely believe she was correct, when she said you must live your life by the fundamental values of: Purpose.
Self-esteem.
Reason.
We’ve discussed the virtue of selfishness before. Now let me really blow your mind. What do you think when I tell you that... Your highest moral purpose must be your own happiness. Does that threaten you? Offend you? Make you angry? If so, please take a good look at that. Because this is the only healthy, sane way to live. And the only way that ensures the survival of the species, and the well being of most people. In fact, it is the only honorable way to conduct any relationship! For more than 15 years, Randy Gage has been helping people transform self-limiting beliefs into self-fulfilling breakthroughs to achieve their dreams. Randy Gage is a modern day explorer in the field of body-mind development and personal growth. He is the author of the best-selling albums, Dynamic Development and Prosperity and director of BreakthroughU.com. For more resources and to subscribe to Randy's free ezine newsletters click here now. Copyright © Randy Gage All rights reserved worldwide.
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